I volunteered for Hospice when I was at U. T. Tyler completing my undergraduate work, and I am now a student at U. T. Southwestern medical school.

Being with people at the end of their lives taught me some important lessons.  One is the value of presence… just being there can be comforting and soothing, maybe as good a medicine as you can give.

The other lesson I learned is not to take any moment for granted.  Two of my Hospice patients I only visited one time.  It didn’t occur to me that that would be the only time, and it taught me that we should always take every encounter as if it might be the last one.  That’s true of hospice work and it’s true of life in general.

I’ve taken those lessons into medical school, and I think they will make me a better doctor one day.  Hospice work is not sad or a burden.  It is rewarding and it can be a pleasure.  It’s like finishing a book, perhaps bittersweet but priceless nonetheless.

Pat Harelson has been a volunteer for over ten years and has served in several positions for The Hospice of East Texas (HOET). Pat has provided administrative assistance for her volunteer coordinator by mailing letters, filing documents, and conducting phone calls to HOET families and volunteers. In addition, she has aided with community outreach committees and outreach projects, such as volunteering at the “Turn Tyler Pink” event and the “Airing of the Quilts”. In addition, Pat has visited over 30 patients in homes and facilities throughout the Tyler area as a home care direct volunteer. She provides empathetic care and listening to her families and patients. One caregiver explained to the volunteer coordinator that “Pat is not a volunteer, Pat is family!” Pat continued to support this family after the death of the sweet patient by attending the funeral and being invited to sit with the family during the service. Pat is committed as a volunteer by taking part in the Memory Care Connector (MCC) training provided to HOET volunteers. As a MCC volunteer, Pat has extended compassion, love and care, in very difficult situations with her Alzheimer’s and dementia patients.

Pat chose to become a HOET volunteer due the compassion she witnessed when The Hospice of East Texas cared for a friend. It was compassion she had not seen in a long time and she wanted to provide that same compassion to others. Pat worked in the HR field for many years and nothing in her professional work compares to the care she has provided as a volunteer for HOET. One patient Pat visited enjoyed hamburgers, so she would bring them both hamburgers and the sweet lady would pray over their meal. During Pat’s last visit with this lady, she sensed a change during the prayer, and she knew it would be their last time together. Because of her hospice experiences, Pat is very sensitive when death is nearing, and she has developed a sense of peace towards the dying process. The last patient Pat visited became a mentor to Pat and taught her strength, joy, and how to be a prayer warrior. Pat learned to live and live well from the dear lady. Pat explained, “Death is not the end of our journey; it is another chapter of our journey.”

One constant Pat has witnessed from her visits with patients is their reliance on Jesus and many have enjoyed her reading the Bible during the visits. She stated, “I don’t think I would have gained the sensitivity and compassion I have learned as a hospice volunteer from any other experience.” In addition, she said you always have the support and encouragement from The Hospice of East Texas staff when you visit your patients. According to Pat, the most important skills one must have to be a HOET volunteer is to smile and listen. Her previous volunteer coordinator conducted a mentoring visit with Pat and her patient. The volunteer coordinator said, I do not know why I am here, because I am learning from you! You know what to do!

We at The Hospice of East Texas are grateful to Pat Harelson for her 9 years of volunteer excellence!

“I love Hospice. It’s been my love for a very long time.”

“Hospice just changes you. After working alongside the doctors, nurses, chaplains, other volunteers, and seeing the wisdom and skills they impart to patients and families… well it changes you. I am a better person, more compassionate and more comfortable engaging in those tough conversations around death. Most of all, I find joy where I am, and I’m a better version of me.”

“When you help to start something, like I did Hospice of East Texas forty years ago, it’s kind of like your baby, and I’ve held on to it for so long. It’s come full circle for me. Hospice came to our home to help us care for my 93 year old mother in her last months. To watch those nurses’ aides and nurses and doctors and chaplains care for my precious mother touched me deeply. It was like my family caring for my family.”